To be needed
by Dolce Saito
Summary: [Episode 11 one-shot. Hisalisa moment before the atomic bomb went off.] For all she knew she was about to die in a matter of minutes, but it didn't matter, because he was there.


**To be needed**

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><p>She didn't know how long she stayed like that, holding onto him, weeping like a baby and refusing to let go because she had not been that scared in her entire life.<p>

Not when she had jumped out of a burning building.

Not when she had been locked inside a plane minutes away from exploding.

Not when she had been kidnapped and bombs had been strapped to her chest and back.

And in that moment, when Twelve's eyes opened and he looked at her, she knew the reason. _It was him_, he had turned into her rock, her safety blanket. The world could collapse around her and it wouldn't matter as long as he was there. _It wouldn't matter_.

She had been blind-sided by his selfless, caring actions. One moment he had been acting as if her life meant nothing to him and the next he had been there, with her face between his warm hands, refusing to leave her, willing to _die_ with her.

She hadn't expected it._ She hadn't asked for it_. And he still had done everything in his power to show her that she was worthy of somebody's affection; that even if the world turned its back on her, _he _was willing to risk it all, even his life, for her sake.

She hadn't known unconditional love until he came along.

But then he had collapsed in front of her and hadn't opened his eyes or stirred for the better part of an hour. She had been so afraid that the world would end and she wouldn't get to hear his soft voice say her name one more time or see that bright sun-like smile beaming at her again.

So she held on tight now, loud sobs drowning his initial gasp of pain. She cried for minutes and he let her, staying still even as her touch set his wounds on fire.

She finally sagged against him and she felt him shift slightly so that they wouldn't topple over under her weight. One of his arms wrapped around her and his hand stroked her back in soothing circles.

"I'm okay. I'm okay, _Lisa_,"

"Y-you wo-wouldn't wake up, Twelve," she buried her face in his shoulder and gripped the front of his shirt until her knuckles turned white "you wouldn't wake..." she repeated, her words muffled and broken.

She pushed away slowly, shaking hear head as she tried stopping the flow of tears with trembling fingers. She needed to stop now. He was fine and she was just being stupid.

Twelve reached out and wiped a tear with his thumb before pinching her cheek playfully until she yelped.

Laughter erupted from his chest and she frowned at him before a chuckle escaped her lips.

The tears stopped then.

That was part of Twelve's magic, making her laugh even when it was the last thing on her mind.

The sound of helicopters in the distance brought them back to reality. She settled beside him and for a long moment neither of them said a word. The world screamed around them and yet the silence that surrounded them in those seconds of painful awareness was deafening.

"Is Nine really going to destroy the whole world?" she finally asked "Are we all going to die from the atomic bomb?"

The calm way in which she delivered the questions surprised her. She had been frantic about an unconscious Twelve and yet she was taking on the subject of the city exploding and everyone dying with a cool, somewhat detached curiosity.

He stayed silent for a long moment and she thought that maybe he didn't know either.

When he finally broke the silence he spoke of something else entirely, of how he and Nine were raised, segregated from society and only able to rely on each other.

She didn't know where he was going with this but she wished they had more time so that she could hear his whole story. She wanted to know about his past, all of it, no matter how painful or sad it was, she would gladly help him carry that burden.

She felt useless, though. How could she possibly be of any help when it came to something that had already happened? She couldn't go back and give them a happy childhood, _a normal_ childhood.

There was not even enough time left in the present to make up for all the things they had been deprived of.

How could she help?

Even in the little time she had spent with them it had been Twelve helping her, saving her, caring for her.

What had she done in return?

Caused trouble.

Put their lives at risk.

Interfered with their plans.

"Neither one of us was ever needed by anyone before."

She looked at him in surprise then, snapping out of her self-deprecating thoughts.

Understanding slowly seeped in as she felt the sting of tears in her eyes.

"That's why..."

He was doing it again, he was saving her one last time without even realizing it. Her upper lip trembled and she stared at his solemn profile, waiting, just waiting for the last words she would ever hear.

"Thank you, Lisa...I'm glad I met you."

She had given him something in return.

Yes.

The world could end.

She felt her tears spill even as her mouth curved into a smile.

They were looking at each other as the sky exploded above them.

For a moment the light that engulfed them was so bright she could no longer see Twelve and so she closed her eyes, waiting for a blast of fire of that never came.

When she opened her eyes, she was surprised that they hadn't turned to ashes on the ground.

Twelve was still next to her but his gaze was fixed on the scenery above them.

For a brief moment Lisa was slightly disappointed that they were still there, alive and well. She doubted she would ever be more at peace and ready for whatever came next than right then, with Twelve at her side, his warm voice still whispering those kind words inside her head. Making her feel valued, useful, loved.

She turned and reached for his hand, needing the physical contact but unable to tear her gaze from the burning firmament. She wasn't surprised when his hand met hers half way.

_He knows. He always does._

She laced her fingers through his and felt him squeeze back gently.

She didn't have to worry about what was coming now, no.

Because all that she needed for now was him by her side.

**000101110011010101**

**DolceS- It's four am and I don't know what I just did. So I'll just leave this here and hope I'm not too ashamed of it later. I'm sorry if this happens to be awful and pointless. I just...ugh. I don't know. These two kill me.**


End file.
